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Author: Kathleen Bass Article source: http://www.brainstorming247.com/. Used with author's permission.
It may be exciting, the thought of going from anonymous emails to getting an actual date. Let's see how it works, from initial attraction to a face to face date. First it's important to take your time. Starting from looking at their picture, to exchanging "send a smile" and emails -- it takes time to build trust, and get to a first real date. What to do? Here's how to start:
- Meet your date online
- Edit your profile to have more fun
- Chat with your favorites
- Email others
Five practical tips to going from emails to a live date:
Talk on the phone first. Ok, the other person's picture looks fine - so let's take some time getting to know the other person on the phone. It may be that they look great, send nice emails, but are hard to understand, or sound like "something's not right." Pay attention to your instincts. Talk to them on the phone, at least a few times, before agreeing to meet them in person, in a very public place.
Questions to get started with
Here's a few icebreakers that you'll want to use in your emails and phone calls with that other person: 1) What do you like to do on your weekends? 2) Do you like to go out a lot, or stay home? 3) What do you like best about someone you're dating? 4) When you eat out, where do you like to go?
Ask them upfront:
After a few emails and a couple of phone calls, you may be ready to meet them in person. It's up to the both of you. If they are evasive or hesitant to meet, ask them why. It may be simply that they're shy. As long as you can phone them without problems, that may be fine, but, also look for red flags.
You may want to ask them upfront, how they'd like to go about this, to see what their ideas are. After talking on the phone a few times, you should know whether or not you'd like to meet. Make plans, in a safe public place. Then, have fun meeting them at a local restaurant or mall.
Being ready for romance:
Getting started in a new romance is both thrilling and a time of great uncertainty. Myself, I like to plan on finding a man who's both a friend and someone I'm attracted to. Getting from a photo and description, to "first contact" by email, to a phone call and then meeting in person, is lots of fun. Being ready to meet someone also means you may need to juggle your schedule a bit - as dates take up time, when you're having fun on the town with that new person in your life!
How Often Should I email or call them? On the one hand, you don't want to seem overly desperate. Then again, you don't want them to think you're not interested. Finding a middle ground depends on what each person feels comfortable with. Remember, one person may want to send emails twice a week, another, every day. Each person expresses themselves differently, and works on a different schedule. Part of becoming a good dating partner is finding out who you're compatible with, and adjusting your style to fit the other person's.
Getting emails:
It's can be disappointing if an email isn't returned within 24 hours. It also looks over-eager if emails are returned within 2-3 hours. So, find a middle ground. Same with phone calls - always return calls within 24 hours, but don't call back immediately, unless you're on familiar ground with that special person you're talking with. Kathleen Bass is a professional speaker, facilitator and workshop coordinator, specializing in relationships and personality types. For more relationship advice or to contact Kathleen visit http://www.SpeakingAboutYou.com today.
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