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Author: Norma Schmidt Article source: http://www.kabish.com/. Used with author's permission.
Back in college, I wrote for a five-day-a-week, award-winning campus
newpaper. My skills were growing and I was earning a reputation as a
solid reporter.
I was miserable.
If I wasn't in class, I was out inverviewing sources or toiling in the
newsroom. I missed seeing my friends at the dorm, got little sleep and
swigged Maalox to get through the afternoons. And still my desk editor
pressured me to be more productive.
Then an adult advisor gave me an insight I've never forgotten:
AN ORGANIZATION WILL TAKE AND TAKE AS LONG AS YOU KEEP
GIVING. IF YOU WANT LIMITS ON WHAT YOU GIVE, YOU HAVE TO
SET THEM.
This insight has come to my rescue over and over again. It didn't matter
what the organization was: a place of employment, a faith community, a
volunteer group. Setting
healthy boundaries on what I gave was MY job, and no organization
would do it for me.
Not that it's easy. Setting limits can be scary, especially when your job is
at stake. Workplaces vary widely in their responses to employees'
attempts to set limits.
"The cold, hard reality is that you can't always do that where you are,"
says Linda Koch, a recruiter for Flexible Resources, Inc., of Stamford,
Connecticut.
Having a strong track record as a valuable and accommodating
employee helps.
In addition, experts say, you might:
--Put your proposal in writing.
--Be specific about what you want your new schedule to look like.
--Think like your boss. Show how you will meet goals and handle
emergencies when your new limits go into effect.
--Support your proposal with business reasons rather than your
personal reasons.
--Anticipate objections.
--Give your boss plenty of time to review your proposal.
You could even offer your proposal as an "experiment," Koch suggests.
The good news is that technology is allowing workers to keep up
productivity with less face time. Meanwhile, employers are gradually
learning that allowing employees greater flexibility boosts motivation
and loyalty.
Back in college, I didn't have any strategies for setting limits. I just
pushed through my fear, marched up to my desk editor and said I was
going to go home every day by 4 PM.
PERIOD.
That conversation took every ounce of my strength. To my amazement,
though, the sky didn't fall! I was fortunate to be taught a lesson that
guides me to this day.
Everyone needs healthy limits. If you're giving too much, take at least
one small step today to establish the limits that work for you.
(c) 2004 Norma Schmidt, Coach, LLC Norma Schmidt, Coach, LLC, specializes in helping women who are
both professionals and parents to create balance. She offers
teleclasses, workshops and individual and group coaching. Norma
publishes "The Balance Point," a free e-zine, every other Friday. Visit
http://www.NormaSchmidt.com
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