|
Author: Marie Roker Article source: http://www.hotlib.com/. Used with author's permission.
Do you feel that you are living someone else's life? Do you want to feel good and positive about yourself and your life? These 8 simple steps will help you to break free of what is causing distress in your life.
Change Your Approach to Life.
What is controlling your life right now? Are you controlled by your emotions, by your past experiences, or by your thoughts? The way you approach life is the way you will live your life. If you see your life as miserable and a failure, then that is the way you will live your life. By allowing yourself to grow in resentment and regret each day, you are cheating yourself of a quality life. You were not destined to live a life of uncertainty and emotional distress. Your negative experiences and disappointing past is what keep you in desperation and frustration. Start to see things as getting better rather than getting worse. Start each day with a clean slate and with the determination to be at your best. Think about what's possible, not what's implausible. Stop complaining about what isn't right in your life and start to embrace what is good in your life. Don't look back at what you have missed out on and what you have lost; think about all you have to gain. Anticipate the best for your life, be clear on what you want in your life, and then start to create life changing strategies. It's not easy to change your approach; it takes time and commitment to living a better life. On useful way to change your approach is to not put any expectations on the day and to incorporate a bright attitude in your day.
Be Responsible for Your Own Happiness
No one has the power to make you happy. You are responsible for your own happiness. Not your spouse, significant other, children, parents, therapists, life coach, friends, lover, job, career, business, etc. Your happiness depends on your beliefs and attitudes. You can't change the past or predict the future, so be content with what you have today. Happiness feeds your spirits and helps you regain your passion for life. It is up to you to make the strides towards your happiness. If you are constantly dealing with difficult people, develop a plan that will help you keep your sanity when dealing with them. By living in sadness and depression, you are giving away your powers and letting someone or something else control you. If you find that your interactions with certain people control your mood, and then make the decision to control whether or not you will be affected by them. You are in control of your thoughts and emotions. If you are blaming others for your state of unhappiness, ask yourself how are contributing to the problem too? Make a list of 25 things you can be happy about right now. Look over your list whenever you feel yourself giving in to self pity or sadness.
Let People Know How You Want to Be Treated
Don't expect your friends, family and colleague to know what you want. If you have needs that aren't being met, you must clearly communicate what you want. You have to let people know what is acceptable and what is not acceptable you. Be firm with your boundaries and let people know when they have crossed the line. Don't assume because you wouldn't do something to someone, that they wouldn't do it to you. When dealing with strong personalities, let them know in an assertive manner what is not acceptable to you. If you continue to let people disrespect you, then they will just assume that it is acceptable. Be honest with people about how their behavior makes you feel. Don't look for them to change right away, but at least by telling them you are giving the message that you have self-respect.
Stop Putting Up With People and Situations that You Have Outgrown.
What are you still tolerating that no longer works for you? Why are you still putting up with it? Tolerations can become old reliable friends once we've had them for awhile. Although you know that you need to make changes, you avoid doing so because you are so comfortable with the toleration. Getting rid of tolerations requires you to be honest with yourself about what isn't working in your life and then you have to make the decision whether to change it or live with it. But what will it cost you in the long run? After some time, this toleration will drain your energy and sap your enthusiasm for life. If you have been desensitizing yourself from what you are allowing in your life, you will deprive yourself of a fulfilling life. Take some time to write down what you are putting up with and create a plan to change it.
Stop Attracting Drama into Your Life
Do bad things seem to always happen to you? Do you attract unstable or difficult people and situations? Yes, we all face problems in life, but if this is consistent t for you, maybe it's time to look at what you are subconsciously attracting to yourself. If you don't feel right unless there is some crisis or unforeseen circumstance in your life, maybe it's time to shift your focus. You will always have these situations in your life if you are always thinking, worrying or talking about them. Learn to trust your instincts. If something doesn't feel right to you, then don't do it. If you are being pressured or coerced into an uncomfortable situation, stand firm and decline making any major decisions.
Set Realistic Expectations
If your husband or significant husband is not romantic, then don't expect him to do something outrageously romantic on your birthday. If you place unrealistic expectations on people or situations, you set yourself up for disappointment. Be real about what people can and can not do. Don't expect people to live up to your dreams of what they should be like. Don't expect more than people can deliver. If you have idealized expectations on what your life should be like, you may be dissatisfied in the actual results.
Maintain Your Individuality
Are you giving up so much of yourself that you don't even know your true self anymore? If you are living someone else's idea life, then you are not living a self actualized life. You can not make people accept or love you based on who they want you to be. You must be yourself at all times. What is great about you? What are your strengths, your natural gifts? The things that make you who you are can sometimes conflict with other people's expectations. Building your self awareness and knowing your self worth helps you to avoid the pitfall of losing your individuality. You don't want to look back on your life with regret or resentment because you gave up yourself for someone else. Don't make sacrifices that will compromise your individuality. Do what you love to do, find what you are passionate about and live your life with enthusiasm.
Get Help When You Need It
It's so much easier to live in denial than to admit that you need help. Sometimes life can seem overbearing and repeated setbacks can lead to sadness, anxiety and depression. Depression is a debilitating disease that progresses slowly and grows worse with time. There is a difference between feeling blue occasionally and not having any energy to do the simple things in life. This is when you need to make the decision to get help. Your situation will not get any better by not doing anything about it. Realize that you have a serious problem and seek help. Don't try to handle it by yourself or make it go away. Marie Magdala Roker is a Personal Development Coach an Author of Successful Thinking for a Successful Life: How to Banish the Unhealthy Thoughts and Habits That Limit Your Success. She offers Deperate Housewife No More group coaching programs for women who want a safe haven for creating extraordinary possiblities in their lives. You can find out more at: http://www.smartbeecoaching.com Ms. Roker also offers Successful Thinking™ program is an affordable coaching resource that offers support and encouragement when there are roadblocks to success. You can find out more about the program at http://www.thinkandbesuccessful.com.
Bad Credit Mortgage Loans - Are You Killing Your Chances of Getting Approved?
There are a few things you can do unknowingly that will sabotage your efforts to get approved for a mortgage loan. Try to avoid doing these 3 things.
Woodworking: The Best Wood For Beginners
There are hundreds of different types of trees and wood, with a wide range of colors, density, grain, figure, and other characteristics that affect its workabil...
The Psychology of Weight Loss: Part 1 - The INSIDE OUT Mindset
The "INSIDE-OUT" approach to fitness differs from that of conventional wisdom. Most programs work on diet and exercise alone. They give suggestions on what food...
To Realize your Dreams, Focus on Significance, not Success
When you think about making your dreams come true, are you more concerned with being successful, or accomplishing something significant? Find out what the diff...
The Complete Guide To Spotting Computer Spies & Recording Devices
Learn How To Spot Computer Spies & Recording Devices In As Little As 3 Minutes With These 3 Proven Steps. Discover what a hardware key logger looks like and how...
Real Estate Sales Agreement
Explanation of a Real Estate Sales Agreement.
Always Sell To New Eyes And New Ears
One of the hardest things for you to do as an advertiser to do is to step into your prospect's shoes and really understand what makes him buy, and to find out h...
Precious Moments
Keep The Hearts Alive
Golf Training Principles That Produce Results
Time is a precious commodity when it comes to golf. We need to set aside time for practice, play and training in addition to managing our jobs, our families and...
Do You Need Accounting Software for Your Small Business?
How do you know whether you need to buy accounting software for your business and what are your choices?
Social Security Rant
This article deals with Social Security. The article debates if Social Security is going broke, and if Social Security should be privatized.
Great Groups! - Getting a Group to Think Like a Genius
Wouldn't it be great to have an Edison or Einstein, or Mozart at your next meeting? If you had a genius at your meeting, do you think you might come up with be...
The Average Growth In Babies
Growth charts are tools your pediatrician can use to keep track of your child's physical growth. During each checkup, the doctor will measure your baby's length...
Dog doors – dog and owner reprieve
If you need to buy a dog door then have some fun doing it online. Not only will you find discount prices but you'll have a huge selection of colors, designs, sh...
If We Are Eating 99% Fat Free, Why Are We 99% Fat?!
It's amazing that we are buying 99% fat free products, yet 60% of the population is overweight or obese. How can this be?
Epic t60 treadmill
The Epic t60 Treadmill is an economy model made exclusively for Costco, but includes many of Epic's best features.
Decision-Making: The Right Way!
Why do some people end up with boring jobs, living paycheck-to-paycheck while others are sitting on top of the world? Did some simply make 'bad' decisions while...
Basic Management Skills - Relationships
Recent studies have shown that industrial supervisors are working at less than 60 % of their potential. Basic management skills training is guaranteed to change...
What is Forex Trading?
Forex, or Foreign Exchange, is the simultaneous exchange of one country's currency for that of another.
Customer Testimonials - The Power of Having Others Tell Your Story
It's easy to say great things about my own product or service. When another, disinterested party says great things about my product or service, it carries cons...
Brilliant Autumn: Reaping a Bounteous Harvest
Autumn can be filled with anticipation of beauty and strength. It can bring satisfaction of a job well done and convey contentment and strength as life prepare...
Do You Make These 5 Mistakes When Writing Sales Copy?
A brief list of some of the common mistakes people make when writing sales copy...
Guide to Homeowner Loans
Here is a useful guide to Homeowner Loans.
Adding to Your Level of Health is the Key
Health is something you must add to. You will never be left with health by treating symptoms and disease...
|
Print this page